My Husband's Heart

It Is beautiful. 

And not just in a yeah, he's a good guy, he's a Christian kind of way. 

It is beautiful, in a  pure heart, true believer, Gospel sharing, awesome Husband, amazing Daddy, full of Christ's love sort of way.

Did I make myself clear enough? 

The Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon Him,
The Spirit of wisdom and understanding,
The Spirit of counsel and might,
The Spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the Lord      Isaiah 11:2 NKJV

I never thought any man could ever love our Lord and Saviour as much as my own Daddy does, but I have found one!!  He trusts God, and knows that the Bible IS the infallible word of God.  He seeks wisdom and guidance from the Holy Spirit always. The Holy Spirit in turn gives my husband the wisdom to teach and guide me in patience and trust. 
He has a boldness in Christ that I have always seen in my Daddy and I am proud to call him the leader of our home.  He is neither a harsh, nor selfish leader, and he grows in love and care for our family. Because of this, I have grown in willing and loving submission to my husband's leadership.

As with any Christian my husband has been through attacks from the devil, and the world, and even sinful flesh in its obvious forms.  But, because of his knowledge of God's word, those attacks will never work.  He spoke with someone earlier this week, and as the phone call progressed, he was talking about the bible and how it gives us instructions for our lives. After realizing that this person had no idea what he was talking about in the Bible, finally, he asked them, "Are you Christian?" (the very nature of the phone call suggested otherwise, so it needed to be asked) But, he was prepared for it.

¹⁶ All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for

 reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, ¹⁷ that the man of God may be

 complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.  2 Timothy 3:16-17

**********

See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ.  Colossians 2:8

**********

 ¹⁰ Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. ¹¹ Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. ¹² For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age,^[a] against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. ¹³ Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. ¹⁴ Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, ¹⁵ and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; ¹⁶ above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. ¹⁷ And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God;  Ephesians 6:10-17

I thank God every day for my amazing husband. 

He is amazing only by the Grace of God. 

Sorry for the silence

I have been such a bad blogger lately.  I have been so busy that by the time I sit down and open my laptop to blog, I just kind of go limp. Physically, mentally, emotionally....limp.  It takes every bit of energy that I have left at the end of the day just to drag myself to the freezer and get three two one ice cream sandwich.  I keep telling myself that I don't want to be one of those bloggers who only blogs a couple of times and then just completely stops.  Of course, I have ran across a few of those, and it drives me nuts!  I want to know what happened, did they adopt? Get pregnant? Have a failed match? What happened??!!! I promise, I will not leave anyone hanging! 

However, after many days and nights of prayer and crying (on my part of course, I can't get Roger to cry no matter how hard I try....ha ha) Roger and I have decided to leave our current agency.  We had not turned in our paperwork to them yet.  We only had to get vaccinations updated for our dog Bear.  He has reactions to the shots, so I have to medicate him and take him on a Saturday so that I can watch him the rest of the day.  Well, EVERY single Saturday, something kept coming up.  In the meantime, we kept praying, and seeking God.  I have found several different couples in different phases of the adoption that are using our agency and they have nightmare stories to tell.  One couple in particular, the wife has become very dear to my heart. I actually have not known her very long, and I have only seen her a couple of times, but we talk often. When God puts someone in your heart, you can feel their pain, and I felt hers.  I prayed with supplication for our friends, our agency and our situation. 

And you know what? 

Do I even need to type it....

God answered.  As always! 

He put things and people in our path that made our way perfect. 

I am still praying for the agency and for all of the families that are in the different stages of adoption with them.  I have met some people who are really hurting and it breaks my heart for them. They have so much money tied up in this agency that they don't feel like they can leave.  Please help me to pray for them.

 Dear Heavenly Father, I ask that you bless the families going through trials during the adoption process, no matter what agency they are with. Minister to their spirit, and where there is pain and hurt, give them your mercy and healing. Where there is fear, reveal your love and give them courage. Raise up their spiritual leaders, and friends to support and encourage them. In Jesus' precious name I pray, Amen. 

Joy in Trials?

I borrowed this from a blog friend of mine...(of course I asked permission first!)  I enjoyed it, and I hope you will too! 

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4

Why would we be joyful when facing trials and hardships?  That's a pretty foreign concept to us, isn't it?  Don't we face trials and hardships as a consequence to sin and as a result of living in a fallen world?  Well, yes, but that's not always the case. 

Maybe there's a bigger purpose.

Look back at the verse.  Trials = the testing of our faith

The testing of our faith develops perseverance.  Beth Moore states that the Greek word for perseverance means to "nerve oneself", or keeping your feet while being tossed around by strong winds, or "heroic endurance".  Perseverance = endurance

Endurance works in us to make us mature (or "perfect" in a different version) and complete. Perfect, not meaning sinless, but "that which has achieved or reached its goal, objective, purpose", lacking nothing.

Remember Jeremiah 29:11? "'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future'".  God has plans for each of us.  So, trials in our life are the testing of our faith which push us toward the goal and purpose that God has for us. If we don't experience these trials, we don't become mature and complete and wouldn't reach those goals.

We can be assured that we will experience all kinds of trials and hardships in this life.  We can be joyful, even in the midst of those things, knowing that those things are working in us to mature our faith and put us one step closer to God's goal for us.

He is the Potter and I am the Clay

I am a work in progress!!!!

After my last post, I found myself growing increasingly frustrated with our adoption agency.  I was so disappointed in them.  I started looking at other adoption agencies, and seeing what they had to offer, just out of curiousity....well that's what I told myself.
I know that, but my human nature wants me to doubt and question God's will. I thank God that he allows me to die to self daily. I am still learning to distrust myself, my wisdom, my strength and look to God alone for it all.

This is the only way I can walk in the spirit and live a victorious life!!  

I have been praying incessantly for this particular branch of our adoption agency. I am praying for all of the adoptive and birth families that are passing through there.  The agency has an amazing opportunity to minister to so many people, and I pray that none of those opportunities are missed. 
 
Heavenly Father, Thank you for keeping me spinning on your potter's wheel, shaping and reshaping me.  Help me to keep my clay moist with daily prayer in accordance to your will. Please keep your hand on the ministry at the adoption agency. I pray that all families who come in contact with them also come in contact with you.  In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Trust God First

We haven't had much going on lately with the adoption.  Roger's father had emergency heart surgery 3 weeks ago, and the adoption just kind of took a back seat. He is doing great now, so I am trying to get us back on track with this baby business........

I was going over all of the paperwork this week and we have everything done except for our self studies (10 pages for EACH of us!) and I am missing the vaccination records for one of our dogs.  Let me tell you, these self studies are pretty intense and I am learning things about my self, I had no clue about!!...lol...well, not really, but it sure feels like it!  We are planning to have everything done in the next several weeks. 

I have had something on my mind about our agency that has been bugging me. I am not anxious or nervous about it, just disappointed I guess.  We received an email from them, that was sent out to all of the families that currently have open cases.  This email stated that they had to cut their budget and that they were letting go of several people.  In addition to the staff cuts, they were evaluating their processes and there would be some other changes. These changes were going to affect people who were in the application phase and in the homestudy phase.  We fall under the homestudy category.  SO....that email was received 2 weeks ago today. The email also stated that everyone would be receiving a phone call by Friday, April 13, (TODAY) to let us know how we would be affected.  Of course, we were a little concerned, because we want to know asap how this is going to affect us. However, we thought, "Hey, they are probably going to be bombarded with phone calls over this, so let's just wait until they call us".  Well, we have not received any communication what so ever from our agency.  I have to say....THAT really disappoints me.  To make matters worse, I was reading another persons blog who is going through the same exact agency and she is a couple of years into this and she made a comment along the lines of Yet ANOTHER staff change.......Oh dear Lord...  Now, let me reiterate, I am not anxious in any way over this. For those of you that know me,  know if I were anxious I would have been calling them the day after we received the message about the changes.  I just wish they wouldn't tell us they are going to do something and not do it.  I am not doubting our decision to go with this particular agency, because I do believe we are there for a reason. 

I am not anxious because everyday, I am :

reminding myself that God is Sovereign. 

reminding myself to trust God first, and not man.

reminding myself of Psalm 118:8: It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. 

Dear Heavenly Father, It is your love that is helping me through this process. The daily revelation of your grace and mercy gives me a grateful heart and spirit that sustains me.  My greatest desire is to keep moving, growing and trusting in you.  I know that your desire is for me to live a life trusting in you with a completely surrendered heart.  Help me to continue to grow my trust in you so that I will be able to walk by faith and not by sight. In Jesus’ name, Amen.  

My Hope is in you

 I meet with You and my soul sings out
As your word throws doubt far away
I sing to You and my heart cries
Holy! Hallelujah, Father, You're near!

My hope is ,in You Lord
All the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm
A peace that passes understanding is my song
And I sing
My hope is in You, Lord

I wait for You and my soul finds rest
In my selfishness, You show me grace
I worship You and my heart cries Glory
Hallelujah, Father You're here!

My hope is in You, Lord
All the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm
A peace that passes understanding is my song
And I sing
My hope is in You, Lord

I will wait on You
You are my refuge
I will wait on You
You are my refuge

My hope is in You, Lord
All the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm
My hope is in You, Lord
All the day long
I won't be shaken by drought or storm
A peace that passes understanding is my song

And I sing

My hope is in You, Lord
My hope is in You, Lord
My hope is in You, Lord!!!

Thank you Aaron Schust for singing such a beautiful song to worship our Lord and Saviour!! This song hits the nail right on the head!    

Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage,

And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord! Psalm 27:14

We are still working on our home study paperwork as well as waiting for our appointments for Psych evaluations, Expectations consultation with the agency (not sure what that even is!) and our physicals.  We can’t turn any of the paperwork in until those appointments are completed and the doctors submit the paperwork to the agency. That means more waiting….

[Insert Jeopardy “think” music here]

Now Y’all know how I feel about waiting…… Of course I remind myself again and again about Abraham in the Bible.  He trusted God and waited faithfully, and 25 years later, God was faithful to him and gave him a son. Now that’s some serious faith and patience right there…….

And we are not even through our homestudy yet!! 

I TRUST GOD, it is that simple. However, I have to learn to trust him to the point that I am no longer anxious.  Waiting and trusting go hand in hand, what a valuable lesson our God is teaching me!! 

But those who wait on the Lord

Shall renew their strength;

They shall mount up with wings like Eagles,

They shall run and not be weary,

They shall walk and not faint.

Isaiah 40:31 NKJV

Dear Heavenly Father,  I have asked you to direct my path, please give me the patience to stand on your promises.  Strengthen me as I wait.  I trust you and I will follow your lead.  In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.