Painted Meadow

Friday

Trust God First

We haven't had much going on lately with the adoption.  Roger's father had emergency heart surgery 3 weeks ago, and the adoption just kind of took a back seat. He is doing great now, so I am trying to get us back on track with this baby business........

I was going over all of the paperwork this week and we have everything done except for our self studies (10 pages for EACH of us!) and I am missing the vaccination records for one of our dogs.  Let me tell you, these self studies are pretty intense and I am learning things about my self, I had no clue about!!...lol...well, not really, but it sure feels like it!  We are planning to have everything done in the next several weeks. 

I have had something on my mind about our agency that has been bugging me. I am not anxious or nervous about it, just disappointed I guess.  We received an email from them, that was sent out to all of the families that currently have open cases.  This email stated that they had to cut their budget and that they were letting go of several people.  In addition to the staff cuts, they were evaluating their processes and there would be some other changes. These changes were going to affect people who were in the application phase and in the homestudy phase.  We fall under the homestudy category.  SO....that email was received 2 weeks ago today. The email also stated that everyone would be receiving a phone call by Friday, April 13, (TODAY) to let us know how we would be affected.  Of course, we were a little concerned, because we want to know asap how this is going to affect us. However, we thought, "Hey, they are probably going to be bombarded with phone calls over this, so let's just wait until they call us".  Well, we have not received any communication what so ever from our agency.  I have to say....THAT really disappoints me.  To make matters worse, I was reading another persons blog who is going through the same exact agency and she is a couple of years into this and she made a comment along the lines of Yet ANOTHER staff change.......Oh dear Lord...  Now, let me reiterate, I am not anxious in any way over this. For those of you that know me,  know if I were anxious I would have been calling them the day after we received the message about the changes.  I just wish they wouldn't tell us they are going to do something and not do it.  I am not doubting our decision to go with this particular agency, because I do believe we are there for a reason. 

I am not anxious because everyday, I am :

reminding myself that God is Sovereign. 

reminding myself to trust God first, and not man.

reminding myself of Psalm 118:8: It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man. 

Dear Heavenly Father, It is your love that is helping me through this process. The daily revelation of your grace and mercy gives me a grateful heart and spirit that sustains me.  My greatest desire is to keep moving, growing and trusting in you.  I know that your desire is for me to live a life trusting in you with a completely surrendered heart.  Help me to continue to grow my trust in you so that I will be able to walk by faith and not by sight. In Jesus’ name, Amen.